April is Autism Acceptance Month. WAMC has the story of one local 16-year-old and his family.
“It was kind of heartbreaking not being really able to explain to him, you know that first you’re going to this school, we’re going to be living and then switching to Anderson when your spot becomes available,” Aimee said. “Then once you start Anderson, this is going to be until you’re 21, there was really no way to explain it to him.”
That’s Aimee Feller. She and her husband Josh Feller say placing their son Jake at a full-time residential school, the Anderson Center for Autism, was the best decision their family could have made.
Jake is severely autistic, meaning he faces significant social and communication challenges. He now lives as the Anderson Center for Autism.
Autism affects everyone differently — that’s why it’s called a spectrum.
Feller says her son, who is non-verbal, has been living at ACA for nearly three years. She says having a child with autism can be an isolating experience for everyone.
“I would take him to the playground in Manhattan, right? I would see him be interested in a typical kid,” Feller said. “And it would it was heartbreaking, because they’re not interested in him and they don’t understand.”
Tina Covington is the Chief Operating Officer at ACA, which houses more than 140 students, and educates 120 adults and 40 preschoolers. Covington says giving children, especially ones with special needs, the tools they need to succeed is crucial.
“It creates less stressors on the family. And I think when you come to a place like Anderson, that there are other individuals, there is a community of friends there for them,” Covington said. “But also, we help create that consistency and predictability and control over their environment that they may not have had at home.”
Before getting here, Jake had attended District 75 schools in Manhattan — public schools for students with disabilities.
“We always knew he was eventually going to go live in residential,” Feller said. “That was his eventual destiny, which we knew, she told us that, even before he needed to so with the back of our heads, we knew that then COVID came and it coincided with him getting older, his behaviors. Jake has always been a docile, sweet kid, and he is to this day, but he went through a really rough go as a result of everything Aimee just said. And he had a really rough go because COVID was probably the worst possible thing, because he lost all structure, and school, and we were stuck home with literally nothing to do. And that exacerbated his behaviors.”
However, Feller says she is worried about her son’s future. According to a report by the New York State Comptroller’s office, more than 80 group homes closed between March 2020 and November 2021 due to staffing shortages. She hopes the state and federal government will focus on the needs of individuals in group homes.
“You really have to be like an angel sent from heaven to take that job. And it really shouldn’t be where they’re making, you know, you could go be a manager at Target and make more money than someone who’s playing Mom and Dad, and, you know, 3 in the morning, if my son has to go to the bathroom or is sick, they’re the one taking care of him,” Feller said.
The Fellers say parents of neurotypical children play an important role in acceptance. They say parents should educate themselves, in turn, educating their children.
Covington says reaching out and finding support in community groups is important for both parents and children with special needs.
“Just so you know, you’re not alone,” Covington said. “You have that relief of understanding who you are and to know that, that doesn’t change anything really, but that it doesn’t change anything about what you could do, your future or how that’s going to look. Right? There’s so many opportunities.”
The Fellers say the bottom line is education; educating people on how others may be different, but also that people with special needs are humans with feelings too.
Events to highlight Autism Awareness Month are being held across the region. On April 14, The Arc Lexington and Saratoga Bridges will hold its Annual Autism Expo, a free event meant to provide people with autism spectrum disorders resources and sensory-friendly events. In Schenectady, the Autism Society Greater Hudson Region will host a costumed 5k run/walk. And the 33rd annual Autism Conference is scheduled for April 10 in Springfield.